Have you ever run a marathon?
I have not – nor do I have plans to, but I did watch the new movie, Brittany Runs A Marathon the other day and I was inspired to share the many coaching gems contained in that film. I hope these may inspire you as you continue to move toward that better version of yourself too.
And not to worry, this email has nothing whatsoever to do with running.
Instead, the overarching theme is:
It’s never too late and you’re never too far gone to change.
But what’s really interesting is what unfolds when you’re on the way toward change… and THAT’s what this movie illustrates so well.
The nuggets are found within the wisdom of transformation…
It takes courage to step into the next best version of yourself – and this can totally seem like you’re running a marathon.
Based on a true story, the movie introduces Brittany – an almost 30 ‘Hot Mess’. She’s sloppy and hilarious – kind of a mix between Amy Schumer, Rebel Wilson, Aidy Bryant and Melissa McCarthy. Snarky, edgy, witty and sweet.
She goes to the doctor hoping to get a prescription for Adderall, but instead she’s told that she’s obese, unhealthy and needs to lose 50 pound. (He literally murmurs, “diet & exercise” while handing her a couple pamphlets.)
I don’t want to spoil the movie, so go watch it when you can.
When you do, I want you to pay attention to these four areas that just smacked me in the face as supremely universal when it comes to change – especially when it involves health and weight loss – no matter what the age, gender, sport or life situation.
1. SMALL GOALS – A supporting character in the movie gave Brittany these words of wisdom that mean EVERYTHING when it comes to making changes and sticking with them…Take tiny, little, baby steps… Say you want to lose 50 pounds or run 26.2 miles….this realistically won’t happen overnight. It’s pretty much physically impossible to do either safely that fast.These larger goals need to be chunked down into bite sized, manageable pieces or else you’ll just get overwhelmed and give up. In Brittany’s case, she decided she would start running to lose weight and so she started by running 1 block. Then 1 mile, then 2 miles, etc…
2. EXPECT IT TO BE HARD AND EXPECT OBSTACLES – Even when Brittany started running that first block, she ran into obstacles that could easily have made it WAYYY easier to turn-tail and give up. There was a pack of cute guys, a bunch of pretty, thin girls, a woman with a double stroller, a creepy clown LOL…She had to literally run around or through each of these obstacles and keep going…Even more challenging obstacles came later on as the marathon drew near – an injury, money issues, etc…But she stayed focused…These bigger obstacles meant that her goal would probably not happen as planned and that it would probably take her longer, but she just kept going.
3. SOME PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE WILL NOT ACCEPT THIS “NEW YOU” – This was so well done in the movie with Brittany’s “party buddy”. It was heartbreaking though…. it hit some of my own old wounds.Like when I quit smoking and became a vegan in my 20s. I literally was kicked out of the house I was renting with friends because I was becoming a different person and my friend at that time, didn’t accept this new version of me. Getting kicked out of that house was the best worst thing that ever happened to me though because it set me on a better path where I created a new, more aligned circle of people.Similar relationship changes have occurred in other friend/colleague/work settings too throughout the years – maybe not as dramatic as that one, but the dynamics I’ve had with many people in my life have definitely changed throughout my 30s, 40s and even now, in my 50s – as I continue to evolve into the real me that I’m STILL becoming.Whatever you do, don’t revert back to the older version of yourself just to keep the peace or to make someone else feel better. Brittany didn’t. She stood up for herself with her friend who wanted her to keep partying and stay stuck. Brittany kept moving forward – leaving the friend behind.
4. DON’T LET THE EXTERNAL GOAL TAKE-OVER WHAT REALLY MATTERS – This was probably the most powerful lesson in the movie and it’s easily missed if you’re not paying attention. There was a scene where Brittany was fixated on the number on the scale – so much so that she would get off the scale – go running – and weigh herself again right after her run in hopes that the number would go down. UGH, I remember doing something similar at Weight Watchers where I wouldn’t eat or even drink water – and I would make sure my bladder was completely empty -before any weigh-ins.Brittany was going further with this though -making this obsession with the number and the marathon #1..She would ignore her injuries – she pushed kindnesses away – she blew off family – she became clouded to what was really important.What was she missing? Her WHY
.She wasn’t appreciating that she was actually transforming her LIFE. She couldn’t see that she was demonstrating to herself that she could accomplish anything she set her mind to.
She also wasn’t appreciating the precious few people that were there for her from the beginning – encouraging her every step of the way.
HER INTERNAL BEING AND THOSE SUPPORTING HER HAD TO MATTER MORE THAN THE EXTERNAL GOALS.
I get chills thinking about this because most of us have been there. Heck , I can easily go there for sure with my work.If we manage to stick with our goals – the vision and dreams we have for ourselves – how do we do that without foregoing everything else? How do we do BOTH without pushing away everyone and everything that matters for fear that they might also interfere with achieving the goal?You have to start with that broader, holistic view from the get-go.
This is why when I work on setting goals with myself and with my clients and students, I want them to go big-picture and deep …
When setting your intentions and goals, go beyond XYZ number on the scale or accomplishing XYZ.Include your deeper why’s – which usually involves that inner soul level and the people that love and care for you…these essential aspects of life need to come BEFORE the goal ALWAYS.
This is foundational and then you integrate the goal – the hows and whats with that foundation. Otherwise, you will have achieved the external goals and then what? You’re alone…empty…miserable…
In other words, it’s kinda like what happens when you go on a restrictive diet, it’s not sustainable.
This course correction was well done in the movie where she found a way to still stay true to her goal, as she eventually found a balance – she put away the scale, kept her training and her eating/drinking in check – but not obsessivley – and she reconnected and made amends with the people in her life that really mattered.
Such a good movie!…I mean, it won’t win an Oscar, but the theme spoke to me for sure…If you’ve seen or will now watch Brittany Runs a Marathon, please tell me what you think…drop me an email and let me know what resonated with you – what you noticed. I love when movies both make me laugh AND make me think…and this one did both.
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