My business coach has our group planning for growth in the year ahead.
Once again, I almost always translate what I’m learning and practicing over in that space as I see immediate connections to you (and me) on our journey over here in this space.
Here’s the bottom line if you have goals to improve your health, your relationship with food, eating or drinking, your weight, body composition (or anything):
The person you WERE has gotten you to where you are right now.
And you should know that she’s pretty frickin’ awesome – (meaning you). Don’t THINK anything less than that. Be grateful for her (you) in every way.
AND….NOW….
If you have a dream for more…a desire to improve what you have right now -(you don’t HAVE to want more, but if you DO have that vision for yourself….)
Well, THEN…
You need to BECOME HER….
She’s next level.
What got you here, won’t get you there.
BUT there’s a caveat for the body change space…and this is super important for those of you that are dealing with imbalances – like if you’re a woman over 40 or otherwise struggle with weight, disordered eating/drinking or with hormone or other functional issues….
(This is where business and body change don’t always correlate well…)
With business, you have to PUSH yourself to do uncomfortable things like make offers, be rejected, learn technology, hire and fire people, invest time and money in things that might flop, present your message in front of a lot of people, be open to criticism, go on video, work when you want to rest sometimes, etc..
- With body change, it’s a bit more complicated. You have to – HAVE TO – prioritize the inner work which informs your stress balance – along with getting proper sleep, nutrition, movement and pleasure – as you BECOME that next level – or else you either won’t be consistent or the body won’t allow you to use it’s stored fat (and/or it might get inflamed, slow down metabolically, launch an immune attack, not recover, age faster, etc..)
- And even with eating/drinking behavior change, you can’t PUSH through that either – it’s quite the opposite in fact – you HAVE TO slow waaayyy down and notice and FEEL the feelings you’re trying to numb – you have to go underneath the compensatory behavior to understand WHY your habit/lower brain is feeling unfulfilled, scarcity or stress..You don’t just slap on a bunch of restrictions and rules on top of what you’re trying to mask.
SO…
What this means as you approach your body/health goals in the year ahead…
(again, this only applies if you have improvement goals – if you’re happy with where you are – Go YOU! Keep doing what you’re doing, my friend!)
But if you’re still working on improving some things, keep these 3 essentials in mind:
1. WHAT’S YOUR WHY?
Why do you want what you want in the first place?
Is that ‘why’ coming from a truthful, honest, loving, abundant place?
Permanent transformation works best when there’s a deep soul connection to the reason WHY you’re wanting what you want.
Here are a few of my business WHYs:
- I have a deep desire – a calling, if you will – to help women stop stupid dieting and crazy over exercising, but most of all, my deep why comes from that deeper mindset shift that happens when women feel empowered with their thoughts, their mindset around their body, food, etc.. and confidence in what they can accomplish as they step into who they really are.
- Another big why for me is freedom…financial, creative, expressive, & time freedom….In business, there’s a tendency to want to “Hustle” – to put more pressure on myself to achieve more – do more – this crucial ‘why’ reminds me that my work must come from a balanced place or why even bother? If it’s not coming from balance, peace and ease then I’m being a hypocrite..and it’s just not worth it if my business costs me my family and friend time, my pleasure, self care and connection with life, love and fun.
- Another driving “WHY” is this: I want to show myself what I can do – who I can become…One of my coach/teachers calls this: “Blowing Your Own Damn Mind” – basically this ‘why’ has me wanting to show myself what’s possible – especially now in my 50s.
2. BECOMING HER
I titled the post with this theme because it’s THAT critical to you getting to where you want to go.
You MUST BECOME the person who lives that life in that (realistic) body that you desire…but it must be authentically YOU.
So my body goal this year is to permanently lose 5% more body fat, to build some lean muscle, regain some strength with good range of motion by June 1 – in a balanced way that I love and could continue for life…This is not a scale weight goal, it’s a body comp and really more of a fitness/performance goal – I really don’t care if the scale is up if it’s due to more muscle and less fat.
I love and will continue daily walking (and occasional gentle yoga), but I also miss my strength – plus muscle is so important as we age – for bones, metabolic health and longevity – but I (personally) want lean muscle mass – not fat on top of muscle – aka bulk – which I had before with Crossfit and overtraining.
(HERE ARE MY WHY’s: 1. To prove to myself that I can continue to get strong in a balanced way in minimal time – probably at home – 15-30 minutes 2-3x week integrated with my usual walking/occasional yoga. 2. That I can change and improve my body while I enjoy my indulgences each week AND 3. to feel even more confident and comfortable in a bathing suit this summer and love every picture I’m in as a Mother of the Bride this fall. :))
To become 5% leaner, I have to step into this headspace:
What would someone who is 5% leaner (and enjoys life fully without being obsessive) think and do everyday?
I must become HER…walk in her shoes – or sneakers… but ALWAYS keeping in mind the balance piece.
I can’t starve myself or “crush it” at the gym everyday…I also refuse to lose weight or fat by restricting the pleasures I love (no Dry January or Whole30 for me this month – NO FRICKIN’ WAY)…
More to come on my process as I continue to move toward it… 🙂
3. CONNECT DAILY WITH YOUR GOAL/DESIRE PLUS….
Just like when I lost that 20+ pounds (and close to 6% body fat) last year…I had to continually check in with my goal, my progress and my process…
How do I feel? Good? Not so good? Why? What went well? What didn’t? Where is my thinking out of alignment?
When I overindulged, which I did – and do – but not a lot and not continually – I’m always connecting with the reasons why I made/make those choices…shining light on them…
When I felt (and still sometimes feel) like either restricting more, cutting more out or just quitting altogether, this is when I ‘thought model’ so that I can understand what my WHYs were – so that I can observe my brain scramble over to it’s old patterns….and gently shift them back to alignment.
Being vigilant with this mental gymnastics routine is so so necessary because we ALL do this..It’s very human!
SO how do these 3 essentials resonate with you? Tell me in the comments (or send me an email) to let me know who YOU are becoming…
If you want to declare your WHYs, even better!
The HARDEST part though is that last piece there….staying with it...through the bumps, lumps and all….
That’s what I’m here to help you with ….<3
xo,
Ev
