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The Three Secrets to Permanent Weight Loss

Because if it’s not permanent weight loss, you’re back on the yo-yo again.

Several years ago, I (embarrassingly) experimented with a popular weight loss protocol. It was homeopathic HCG drops paired with a very low calorie diet.

I actually found a version of this diet (HCG 2.0) that allowed me to exercise with 800 calories instead of the typical 500 calorie protocol (with no exercise).

(Which – SIDE NOTE – is such a red flag – if a diet protocol says you can’t exercise – RUN – don’t walk – the other way.)

I decided on this experiment because I wanted to lose 20 lbs (again!) and one of my holistic practitioners that I admired was offering HCG programs in her practice.

I figured if she gave it her thumbs up, it couldn’t be that bad! (This was before I got my Master’s in Nutrition and really understood hormones and metabolism – not to mention the whole mindset piece.)

Here’s what happened in my mind:

  1. I BELIEVED it would work. I’d researched the ever lovin’ crap out of HCG before buying those drops.
  2. I DECIDED to do it.
  3. I COMMITTED to following the plan for 6 weeks

I cleared my calendar. Absolutely no social events allowed since I couldn’t drink alcohol. I planned a Home DIY project which kept me busy and I stuck with it 100%.

I committed to no alcohol, calories under 800 for 6 whole weeks.

And guess what?

I lost 20 lbs.

I was so thrilled. I got rid of all my heavy clothes and confidently wore my fitted tees and skinnies 👌🏼.

It was awesome!

It really is such a great feeling when you lose the weight and everything fits and looks good.

I don’t know why, but it’s just the best!

Looking back, I actually had all three of the secrets to losing weight in place. I just neglected the permanently piece. 🙄

Over time…the weight crept back on. Slowly but surely…as I went back to drinking wine, seltzers, skinny margs – and eating like I used to (which was still healthy Paleo back then, but often mindless)…

Yep – of course the weight came back on.

And I was back to chasing those 20 lbs again.

UGH! What a harsh lesson.

This is why I do what I do. Because I’ve been there so many times (going back to my teenage years) and it’s the most frustrating, demeaning feeling when you re-gain weight you worked so hard to lose – especially if you’re a nutritionist! 🙄

I’ve said and new clients often say: “If I’m so successful and smart in every other part of my life, why is weight always an issue?”

It goes deeper.

It’s not about the diet. It’s not about needing more meal plans and recipes. We all have more knowledge than we know what to do with.

It’s about consistent application – Paying attention to your thoughts, your feelings, your body, your habits and behaviors.

That’s where permanent weight loss resides.

Back to the three secrets…here’s what was missing for me back then:

  1. BELIEF that I could lose the weight permanently.

This was never clearly and fully understood in ALL my history of dieting.

I always just focused on the fastest, most immediate results. Forcing myself to lose weight by various degrees of restriction.

I guess I naively figured my eating and drinking would magically diminish and adapt to this new weight, but no…

Because much of my eating and drinking was mindless and emotional – not physiological – my behaviors and volume went right back to the level it always knew.

It may seem obvious, but I’d argue that anyone on a diet doesn’t really get this:

In order for weight loss to be permanent, what you do during the weight loss phase, pretty much (maybe just a little more wiggle room) has to be what you continue doing AFTER the weight is lost – FOREVER.

There are a few exceptions, like if you build more muscle, you may increase metabolic capacity, but for most of us (especially women over 40), you need to not deviate too far from the original plan.

OK so secret #1 is BELIEVING it’s even possible. Is it possible that you can lose the weight and keep it off forever. (Of course it is, but if you don’t believe it, it just won’t happen.)

2. DECIDING on doing it. This is that magical mental shift before full on commitment where you just lock in and decide. It’s actually not magic at all. It’s just you ‘letting go’ of the resistance and attachments you may have to your former identity – maybe some attachments to specific foods and/or eating patterns.

You’ll also decide what realistic approach you’ll take that’ll allow for permanent weight loss.

This catalyst phase is secret #2 and you need to be very honest with yourself and not approach this when any sort of desperation and over-restriction.

This eliminates all restrictive diets.

If the diet makes you neurotic, restricted, involves processed foods and no exercise or insane amounts of exercise – it’s probably not going to be something you can keep doing long term.

No diet that you couldn’t keep doing forever should even be considered.

Think about this carefully, but don’t run into indecision or analysis paralysis. That will give you decision fatigue which will also keep you stuck.

Just decide and move forward.

This is why I personalize every client’s approach. We decide together what’s reasonable and then we tweak.

Tweaking is key in the commitment stage, but I’ll touch on it here: If you’re following your plan that you decided upon and aren’t seeing results – but are also not gaining weight – that’s great data!

That’s probably a good maintenance range for you. To lose more weight, something has to change.

Your approach and tweaking will be unique because you’re unique.

3. COMMITTING to stick with it consistently is where the continuous thought work and accountability comes in. This is where your habits, behaviors and subconscious patterns can play with your mind all day long.

Telling you ‘you deserve it’.

Telling you it’s been a hard day. You’re so drained. You need to eat more. Have a drink.

Telling you ‘one won’t really matter (or another one)’.

Telling you ‘this isn’t working’ – you need to do something better – something more drastic.

Telling you it’s going to be hard.

Telling you there are no other choices.

Telling yourself that you didn’t want ‘so and so’ to feel bad. You didn’t want to feel awkward.

Telling you it’s not fair.

Telling you: you screwed up/failed so ‘what the hell – might as well’.

Telling you something must be wrong with you.

Telling you it’s impossible.

It’s your job to immediately pivot those sabotaging thoughts back to your belief, decision and commitment when they come up (which, like I said, could be all day long), because without that constant connection to your commitment, you will give up and THAT’s the #1 reason you won’t reach your goal.

By the way, failing – having a slip up here and there – is not the same thing as giving up. Giving up is when you abandon your commitment altogether – but even then, you’ll still be learning when you’re ready to get back to it.

You’re not going to be perfect (I’m certainly not)…but I’m always aware, always owning my choices and always learning from every slip I choose.

As long as you get back up on that proverbial horse, you WILL do this. I believe that 💯.

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